A good behaviour is what we want to develop in our child. We like to shape them as a person who is well-behaved and caring. We teach them values to be a good human being and at the same time we praise them as well as give feedback wherever required. It is important to share feedback with our kids to make them realise where they are wrong and where they need to improve.
Sometimes it might happen that our kids may not take our feedback positively. They might answer back to us or might not listen at all. Though we give our feedback with a good and positive intention, but they might feel to be criticised or may feel threatened. We know that giving constructive feedback is very much necessary as it builds higher self-esteem in them and also builds good relationships.
There are a few easy tips which we can follow to provide constructive and effective feedback to our kids.
Calm down before giving feedback
When we give feedback angrily, we say anything which comes in our mouths. Calm down before giving feedback to them. Stop and think about how and what you are going to say. How are you going to make them understand that they are wrong here, and they should improve themselves. And how will you make your words kind, caring, helpful and true?
Be friendly with them
Try to be your child’s friend so that they listen to whatever you say. Be somebody whose words they can trust. Feedback can be both negative and positive. Be mindful while sharing feedback with them. Try to share at least three positive feedbacks with one negative one. Help them understand there mistake in private rather than scolding them in public.
Your feedback should not be general
Whenever you are praising your child, remember that there should be a reason behind it. Unnecessarily telling you are a good child and a smart child does not work. Children start giving less value to your words since they don’t know why you are telling such things to them. Keep in mind to give feedback or praise them if you catch them doing something right or wrong.
Try to sense their mindset before providing feedback
Some children are not in a mind to take any feedback as they get too angry or irritated. Let them calm down. Before going feedback, ask if you can talk to them for some time. Make sure to give the feedback in a manner which would calm them down and also at the same moment make them understand where they were wrong and what they should do in such situations.
Try to induce growth mindset in them
Try to teach them values and inculcate positivity in them. Teach them how they can take feedback positively rather than feeling criticised. Let them know that the person who gives them feedback is those who want them to improve and do good to them. So they should listen to them and improve themselves to grow positively.
We do give feedback to our kids, but being parents, we are their role model. So if any feedback is coming from your child, do act on it positively.